My boss is not very smart. She doesn’t have an ounce of common sense. I know what you are thinking. Everyone believes their boss is dumb. In fact, most people probably think they are the smartest individual in the workplace. But, I assure you, my boss is not very smart. To top it all off, she is extremely arrogant and a bit nutty.
A few months back, when the powers that be promoted my boss, I sat baffled for 20 minutes in my tiny cubicle. She can’t use excel. She can’t write. She can’t analyze data. Many days, addition and subtraction baffles her. But she is really good at blaming her staff when something goes wrong. She also really excels at slowing down the pace of the work day by asking everyone long winded stupid questions.
I spent the first few months complaining about my boss to anyone who would listen. I soon learned that gossiping didn’t do anything except exacerbate the situation. It brought negative energy into the work place. Eventually, I realized that until I win the lottery, I must work under my boss and deal with her shortcomings.
Here is some advice I can provide you when dealing with a not-so-smart, crazy, condescending boss.
If you explained a report to her last week, and yet she still doesn’t understand so she asks you about it again, don’t roll your eyes, throw your arms in the air, and scream “I explained this to you last week!” or “I learned this in kindergarten. Why didn’t you?” Your boss will get defensive. Instead, explain the concept again. It’s a good time to practice your public speaking skills also! While explaining the concept to your inept boss, pretend she has a ‘kick me’ sign on her wrinkled forehead or a dunce cap on her bucket head. You will then smile during the explanation.
If your boss is so incompetent that she starts to delegate her work to you, don’t tell her “I don’t get paid enough to do your job and mine!” Feel honored that she has enough faith in you! Gain as much experience as you possibly can. By the way, don’t try and pass on your work to her. She is your superior! Besides, if your boss is truly incompetent, she will do your work wrong. Then, she will blame you.
If she says something to you extremely condescending, don’t beat her up. Instead, take three to four deep breaths. Deep breaths will usually calm you down. If you still want to punch her after the deep breaths, close your eyes and daydream about beating her up. Slap her fat little cheeks. Poke her little button nose. But, when you return back to reality, refrain from violence, unless you want to get fired and go to jail.
If your boss begins to nitpick about little stuff in the office, don’t scream out comments such as “well at least when I get to work I get stuff done. All you do all day is torment you staff!” If she says that playing classical music at your desk is inappropriate, don’t switch to hard rock. Turn off your stereo or use head phones. Every once in a while, pretend to be a drummer and bang the little drummer sticks against her bucket head. But, again, make sure you do this in your head!
If you really believe your boss is crazy, don’t send her brochures about the mental health clinics in the area. Don’t ask her if she wants the number to a good therapist. That’s not your job and those comments will most like upset her. I wish I could give you further advice for dealing with crazy people but I can’t. You will have to grow accustomed to her peculiar behavior.
Remember, for most of us the work day lasts only eight hours! The other 16 hours belong to you. Remember, for those eight hours maintain a positive, upbeat attitude.
Bosses promote incompetent people every day. Some of the most incompetent people make hundreds of thousands, if not millions of dollars a year. Get used to the fact that not-so-bright people exist in the work place. Some incompetent people are even given the opportunity to lead large countries.
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